train of thought

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It’s funny how quickly our minds begin to drift. The power of a song, a word, or a thought. One simple thought has the power to completely shift our perspective on a situation- when in reality, everything is the same.

I catch myself setting such high expectations of myself- as a writer, performer, business person, friend, or person in general. Such high expectations to the point where I lose sight of how to reach those expectations. They become so far in the distance, that they don’t even seem real anymore. I begin questioning why I even had those expectations in the first place. I ask, how do I become this musician? How do I become this artist? How do I become this composer? Why am I not good enough as I am now? Who is this person I “need” to be?

I catch myself just in time- just before I hope on a train to self doubt. I remember that I have already met those expectations. I am a musician. I am an artist. I am a composer. I forgot all that I was as I searched for something more, but if I’m always searching- how do I stop to smell the roses? When will I stop searching? When will I reach a point of satisfaction with the expectations I have already met?

In that, I decide that I have already met my expectations. I am already the best musician I can possibly be, I am already the best artist I can possibly be, and I am already the best composer that I can possibly be. I accept these things, and turn my focus back inwards. I focus on how I am the best musician that I can possible be, I focus on how I am the best artist that I can possible be, and I focus on how I am the best composer that I can possibly be.

I stop searching, and grant myself a beautiful gift in accepting all that I am right now. I give myself permission to love myself fully, as I have spent my whole life trying to meet certain expectations. By doing so, I find joy in the essence of being present. I am present as I write, I am present as I create, I am present as I do everything. Everything is the same, but I am happy. I am all that I am. 

With a simple change of thought, all around me is perfect.

Everything will always be as it is meant to be, it is how you look at it when things begin to change.